In Which Anger Can Be Good

I struggle with feelings of anxiety and depression. Many people do. I sometimes struggle with thoughts of suicide- no, I'm not a danger to myself, don't worry. I'll make sure to reach out if the thought becomes serious, but the thought does pop up from time to time. It does for many other people too. I had to socialize with people a lot today, so I struggled with depression this evening. I forced myself to exercise, but it didn't help. I remembered something my sister had told me once about getting angry whenever she starts feeling especially down, and I was surprised when I was able to reach into myself and find that emotion still there. So tonight we're angry. Tonight we're mad as hell because it's better than wanting to be dead. I've never considered it this way, but perhaps anger can be a tool when used properly.

I'm mad that I don't feel comfortable talking about depression with people who don't experience it. Tonight, we're talking about it. Have you ever gone on a run after skipping a meal? That's kind of what depression feels like. You're hollow inside, you want to feel something but you can't feel anything. You try to do any activity and you just don't have the energy for it.

Okay, gonna be honest here, I was depressed and then someone made me happy and now I can't find it in myself to be angry anymore. I'll do my very best to get angry again tomorrow and continue this train of thought. Until tomorrow!